Over the years, the subject of marriage as a long-term commitment between two individuals has slowly evolved. Divorce has become quite common in today’s society for many reasons. While many cite “irreconcilable differences” as the major reason for “marital disunion,” more factors contribute to this case.
This article will guide you through the top 10 major reasons that lead to the dissolution of marriages.
Poor Communication
Communication is vital in any other interpersonal relationship, especially in marriage. Lack of proper communication and emotional support from either spouse may result in constant clashes, misunderstandings, and quarrels. People do not like to feel negative energy or attitude from their spouses. Most divorced couples attested that resolving such conflicts wasn’t done calmly.
A good number of divorced women highlighted a lack of emotional understanding from their former spouses as a shortcoming in their marriages. It leaves them craving better communication with someone else and turning to divorce as the best option. Family therapy is another effective option couples should take to give their marriage a chance.
Lack of commitment
Commitment in marriages is an important part of marriage that maintains the bond between couples. A high level of commitment allows couples to feel a lot safer and willing to keep the marriage alive. However, when the level of commitment wanes, tension arises, and partners lose interest in the relationship, eventually leading to divorce.
Most surveys conducted among various married couples show that lack of commitment is the most common reason for divorce. Different factors often lead to a lack of commitment in marriages. Infidelity and abuse are commonly reported events that reduce commitment in marriages.
Financial Issues
About 36% of divorced couples alluded to financial problems as a major contributing factor in their marital dissolution. While not all marriages suffer this problem, money issues often breed tension and aggravated conflicts. For example, the popular business magazine Forbes highlighted the effects of different financial views and how having “conflicting money styles” could be detrimental to a successful marriage.
This means that partners must be financially compatible. Tension is bound to arise in homes where couples have different financial perspectives. Partners need to have similar financial goals and patterns to complement each other.
Some couples encounter disagreements on their finances and spending patterns. Some might worry about their partner’s uncompromising spending habit, while others are concerned about their debt. However, couples can take up loans to assist with their financial issues. Debt settlement has proven to be a reliable platform for clearing old debts and improving your credit score to acquire loans. This method helps partners secure the funding they need to clear debts and keep their marriage alive.
Domestic Abuse
Physical, verbal, or emotional violence inevitably tears families apart.
A home where domestic violence exists never feels safe or secure for either partner or the children. This abuse often prompts partners to seek a restraining order or preferably file for divorce.
Although some spouses try to cope with these forms of abuse, others summon the courage to walk away from such toxic relationships.
Long Distance Relationships (LDR)
Despite advancements in technology and mobile platforms, maintaining a long-distance relationship is usually difficult to handle in any marriage. A partner may have to move to a different country for work-related purposes, military, services, or education. Adapting to this change in environment is often a lot to ask and quite difficult to manage in the long run. Constant social, emotional, and psychical interaction is necessary for a relationship. Sadly, financial or work considerations may limit how frequently partners spend time together. Some a partner might enforce boundaries between local peers and distanced spouses. These limitations quench the excitement and expectations of partners as they encounter a situation they possibly never anticipated.
Also, there is the possibility of your partner getting emotionally and physically intimate with someone else, resulting in jealousy and a deteriorating marriage.
At the end of the day, LDRs causes strain in some marriages, resulting in couples’ decision to call it quits.
Extra-Marital Affairs
Infidelity or Extra-Marital relationship is the most common reason for most divorce cases today.
Many marriages crumble for as much as a one-night stand outside of marriages.
Infidelity breeds a lack of trust and confidence in one partner. The feeling of betrayal that comes with unfaithfulness to one’s spouse is often difficult to forgive. This act leads to the gradual decline of romantic connections between partners. Cheating on one’s partner can be a very hard pill to swallow, leading to a deteriorating relationship and, in most cases, divorce.
Early Marriage
The phrase “I do” means a lot in marriages, and sometimes young couples cannot handle all that marriage entails.
According to research, about 50% of marriages before the age of 18 are increasingly likely to end in divorce. Statistics also show that 60% of young married couples aged 20-25 end up separated. There are a lot of factors that contribute to this dissolution. Most early marriages come with challenges that most young couples aren’t prepared to handle. Some young couples aren’t settled career-wise before
Understanding your partner’s personality, perspective
However, early marriages prevent couples from spending enough time getting to know each other very well. This rational decision usually leaves these couples with no other choice than to go separate ways.
Addiction
Addiction is considered as another major reason for divorce. Addiction to drugs, pornography, gambling, alcohol, e.t.c, often leads to marriage breakdowns. For example, an alcoholic man in his intoxicated state may verbally or physically violate his wife without realizing it. Abuse of substances by either spouse also causes sudden mood swings, personality changes and secretive behaviors. Couples in such marriages find it difficult to deal with the repercussions of these habits. Most spouses are concerned about the effect these addictions could have on their children, which leads them to demand separation. However, some couples take proactive steps to control such addictions and save their marriages. Families suffering from habits can seek help from organizations that offer addiction management programs.
Although some marriages recover from these addictions, some feel it best to file for divorce and demand child custody. In some cases, couples consider their partner’s workaholism a major problem. In a recent psychological study, workaholism was one of the leading concerns that fostered negative effects on relationships.
Differences in Views or Ideology
Some couples already go into marriage before realizing how much their views differ from each other. These contrasting views on matters may result in frequent nagging and arguments. Couples need to be on the same page in various aspects of their affairs.
Disagreement on Family Responsibilities
Research studies have shown that conflict over family matters makes a good number of divorces cases. For example, differences in child upbringing, family obligations, and financial provision caused tension and disputes at home. In addition, some couples possessed different views on gender roles, while many disagreed with the allotment of responsibilities in the household.
Conclusion
No marriage is a rainbow slide, as every relationship comes with its ups and downs. However, the common reasons for divorces show there is only so much we can handle as humans. Nonetheless, marriage counselors and family therapists are valuable platforms that help resolve conflicts and challenges spouses face in relationships.
